Late March, early April is the wonderful time of year where high school teenagers across the nation stress out more than usual with the underlying pressure that is…prom. For those who don’t know, prom is short for promenade which started back in the late 1800s only in colleges and universities to promote appropriate social etiquette for graduating college seniors. Ironic that it’s celebrated only in high schools now and is anything but elegant. Since when did a formal dance turn into a place for spoiled rich kids to act more spoiled and rich?

First thing’s first: Promposals

Yes, they’re cute and easy ways to get hundreds of likes on social media considering the most creative ones go viral every year on Twitter, but are they really necessary? The guy (or girl because gender roles do not exist here) spends all of his money on a punny gift and poster, only to never see that homegirl after prom. Not to mention the girls (or guys) expect such an elaborate and perfect promposal from someone they’ve been talking to for like two weeks. Overrated.

Spray tans

Honey, spray tans are not cute. Either all the girls who get spray tans don’t get the correct shade or the spray tan person who did it got their license on some sketchy third party website, but regardless everyone always looks like an oompa-loompa straight out of “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.” It’s possible that we’re biased, but we really just do not see the point in spending money on a service that drastically changes the appearance of those who pay for it and leaves them smelling like old Cheetos hours later. Honestly, who are you trying to fool? Everyone knows it’s fake especially if you went from pale to Donald Trump orange within 24 hours. Overrated.

Dresses and tuxes

Despite all the money spent on spray tans, hair and makeup, somehow girls still find the money to buy $500 dresses they’ll only wear once in their entire lives before locking it away in their closets to gather dust. If the dress is cute, nobody is going to care about the brand or which overpriced, well-known brand name store it was purchased from. The only thing that should matter on prom night is that you’ve surrounded yourself with good people and have a good time, not what the other girls are wearing or what their hair looks like. In all honestly, everyone pretty much looks the same at prom which is exactly why we see no point in spending massive amounts of money on something we’ll wear only once. Also, to the guys who purchase new tuxes for every formal event they attend, why? I know you know that boys hardly stop growing in their teenage years so why on earth spend the money on formal wear you’ll grow out of in one or two months? Every tux looks the same anyway. Overrated.

Prom king and queen

The age old saying is true. It’s just a popularity contest. What’s so great about winning a plastic crown in front of people who hate you for winning only to dance with someone else because your date didn’t win with you? Overrated.

Wearing the same dress

What did you expect? If you bought your dress at Terry Costa then the odds of someone else wearing the same dress as you, to the same school function, on the same night are through the roof. It doesn’t have to be the end of the world, but for all of these egotistical teenage girls it might as well be. The mature thing to do would be to get over it, take a picture with the girl wearing the same dress as you, compliment her, lift each other up. But instead girls have to throw a fit, threaten to leave prom and ruin the mood of everyone around them. Overrated.

Drama

Please for once, let’s leave the petty drama at home. Once again, why are you worrying about what is happening with everyone else? Every year after prom, everyone always talks about drama that happened on the dance floor, who went home with who after the dance, how the girl at the makeup counter didn’t do what you asked for and made you look like your eyes weren’t even open, or that the hair stylist made you look like a wet poodle. Girls always look for excuses to make everything seem worse than it actually is, and it can get really annoying when other people know they look good and are trying to have a good time. Remember any problem related to prom is minuscule. At least try and have a good time with all the money, time and effort you spent. They probably won’t even remember what they were so upset about the next day anyway. Overrated.

Despite everything we just said, we’re both still going to prom. So hopefully this prom season wasn’t too stressful for you and ‘have the time of your life’ at prom 2k17.