Nausea seeped through my brain.
A gut-wrenching pain.

I felt vomit lingering within my stomach on that day in biology, watching the video in clarity yet not believing my eyes. The video mainly focuses on producing the food on our tables; it includes the killing of animals and the process of turning them into the food our restaurants serve. It gave me a feeling of hatred toward the inhumane society I live in.

Later when I arrived home that day we went out for dinner and I was convinced that I had finally seen the ugly truth of this world. Grossed out by the meat-filled options on the menu, I decided to become a vegetarian. Once I did, I experienced a life truly mirroring a roller coaster.

The next day at lunch my peers buzzed in astonishment after seeing my new way of life and I felt the weight of the world pile on my shoulders, one pound at a time.

People stared.
People gossiped.
People judged.

Yet like all pain, it never lasted long.

Only a few asked what caused my change. Others didn’t notice because I had always been invisible to them. Eventually I became the center of conversation through all of my “friends” and I absolutely hated the rumors.

As time passed the rumors somewhat ceased. Although I had to continue to go to school on high alert of who was around, it eventually became my daily life. My lifestyle change was not only new to everyone, but new to me. But never did I expect the large amounts of grief to come along with it.

I became highly accustomed to cliché questions.

Why did you choose this life?
Did you really change or is it just for attention?
Why are you doing something outside of your black culture?

To be honest I always felt overwhelmed when asked, debating in my mind if I made the ‘’right’’ choice. I quickly grew out of it and proudly spoke my truth.

My answer to all these questions remained the same.

It’s my life, my choice.

In my eyes life’s goal is to see past the person in the mirror and see the world beyond ourselves.