“Signs your boyfriend is over you.”
“Come with me to make a gift basket for my girlfriend.”
At first glance, social media appears to be a great tool for strengthening bonds. Yet, behind the glowing screens and endless notifications, an unsettling truth emerges: the very platforms designed to bring us closer may be eroding the foundations of our relationships.
One of the most significant shifts in modern relationships is the loss of independence. What was once a valued component of a healthy relationship is now often sacrificed for constant accessibility and real-time responses.
A common frustration many people face today is the feeling of being left on “read” or “delivered.” Something as simple as the amount of time it takes for a partner to reply to a message can escalate into a full-blown argument.
‘Ghosting’ someone is never the right decision to make, but the reality is that not everyone can balance a romantic relationship with other responsibilities in their life. Prioritizing personal mental health or studies is now often deemed “selfish” by society and dismissed as an excuse. When a party is constantly pressured to show “proof” of their love, it will eventually cause cracks in the relationship.
In addition, there’s a rise of relationship “advice” circulating on social media platforms. While some advice can be helpful, much of it is based on generalized assumptions, oversimplifications or unrealistic ideals.
For example, a person may come across a TikTok of a couple shopping together or going on romantic dates, leading them to question why their partner hasn’t done the same.
“If he wanted to, he would.”
It’s all so unrealistic. Of course, both parties in a relationship must put in effort, but focusing on monetary gifts or acts of service as the primary way to show affection often misses the mark. Not everyone has the financial means to spend lavishly on their partner and that’s perfectly OK. There are countless ways to show love and one act of love shouldn’t be the status quo.
The most problematic aspect of social media is the constant pressure to be in a relationship. With couples constantly on display and trends glorifying romance, many individuals feel invalidated or inferior when they are single. This sets off a harmful chain of events that can lead to unnecessary emotional distress.
In a rush to fit in, individuals may jump into relationships with people they aren’t truly compatible with as they’re driven by a desperate need to find love. However, they may not be in the right mental or emotional state to nurture a healthy bond.
Without a fulfilling sense of self, both partners lose touch with their individual interests, ambitions and identities. Their sense of worth becomes tied up in the relationship and they forget the importance of personal growth.
Instead, people should reflect on their current stage of life and re-evaluate what they need to prioritize so they don’t hurt themselves or someone else in the process. Finding self love and realizing the value of it will allow a person to guide themselves in a fast paced society.
As for those in a relationship, there must be a mutual understanding between the two when it comes to communication, goals and the future aspect of romantic prosperity. Boundaries need to be respected and outside influence such as social media should be carefully assessed.
In the end, there is nothing wrong with slowing down and improving your own mental health. Growth takes time. Love takes time. When people do come to comprehend the complexity of love and learn from it, that is when they will finally escape the dilemma.
