I used to think my senior year would be fun filled and stress free. I had high hopes. In fact, I laid out a blueprint in my mind. I would be productive, finish my college applications, focus on my classes and get all A’s. Once I was done with what I needed to do, I would focus my attention on myself and my happiness.

Except it wasn’t like that. It’s never like that.

Actually I procrastinated on almost all of my school assignments. I procrastinated on this staff goodbye too, if we’re being honest here. But it wasn’t the laziness keeping me from writing this goodbye, it is my dread of goodbyes.

I want to write something important, something that will make a lasting impact and provide the perfect ending. Unfortunately, I can’t find the perfect words for this goodbye.

Senior year was just another angst filled year, but I like to think that all of the ups and downs that this roller coaster of a year had for me were lessons I needed to learn. Therefore, I am thankful.

It was a man vs. self battle with a few people contributing to my inner turmoil, but I have found myself. I am no longer lost.

I stayed resilient and came out stronger than ever.

One of the common high school proverbs is “Don’t let anyone get to you.” But you are a human being with emotions, so just know that not letting anyone get to you is a skilled practice. People will get to you, but it is up to you what kind of mark you let them leave.

Change is inevitable. Some people you are close with may dislike the changes you are going through, and that’s normal. Not everyone is going to be with you for the ride.

If they truly love you, they will be there for you regardless of what they are going through. Just know we are all in this together. Through my ups and downs, my close friends have always been there for me and I am forever grateful. I look at every one of you guys and my heart swells with love.

To my special star, I am so glad you are a part of this universe. You’ve helped guide me through the worst of times; words can’t describe how much I love you. I’m so glad I am your sunflower.

To my friends Tiffany and Jenny, we’ve had the same group chat since eighth grade. I’m thankful for your endless love and stupid jokes that have my stomach dying of laughter and your undying support.

To Gabi, who has always been there for me through the roughest of times, I love you. Thank you for believing in me and encouraging me to throw myself at the world. I’m beginning to think that it’s finally going to catch me.

For the person who left a permanent scar, I now know I am strong and can get through anything so thank you for the mark you left.

And thank you to all my friends in newspaper who have been there for me through my slumps, you are amazing and I am so glad I got to be a part of such an amazing and supportive staff.

And to Mama Hossain, who swallowed the American dream and choked on it, you are the most selfless and loving person I know. You’ve helped me find my true passion in writing and in life. I used to beg the sun to shine for me every day, but no longer. You helped save me.

To everyone who I have got to spend these past four years with, I am so thankful for the memories and wish you all the best.